Let's call this a thought experiment, shall we?

[marnanightingale]

1) Your life contains:

a) a corgi.

b) a sofa.

c) a wool blanket.

d) a half pound of butter.

e) some cotton underpants.

2) Via a brief and apparently largely harmless stay in the front half of the corgi, the bulk of the butter has been transferred from a plate on the table to the above.

3) You would like to remove the second-hand butter from the above items. Hot water and detergent have made no impression, nor has trying to scrape it off manually, as it just sinks into the fabric.

4) So. Now what?

This post was originally posted on Dreamwidth. where there are comments. Comment here or there as you prefer.

Comments

[elizilla]

Lay a paper towel over it and iron it, to pull the butter into the paper?

[pantryslut.livejournal.com]

Sprinkle the blanket with baking soda. Let sit for a while (hours). Vacuum.

For cotton underpants I recommend Zout! or similar laundry spot remover.

[thnidu.livejournal.com]

how.to or other similar sites?

[harimad.livejournal.com]

Baking soda and very hot water??

It's a reach but here's the theory: baking soda + fat = soap (very bad soap, but soap). So coating very greasy dishes in baking soda then soaking in very hot water, leads to soap being formed and removed from the dishes. So maybe for cloth as well?

[stickcow.livejournal.com]

Fat is turned into soap by lye, not baking soda. Baking soda works as a water softener and cleanser for reasons I don't know. It's also pretty absorbant, which might help pull the fat up.

Vinegar can be used for removing oily residues too.

[tenacious-snail.livejournal.com]

I was thinking ice, as way to keep the butter solid, at least as regards the sofa and wool blanket.

[c-crockett.livejournal.com]

Maybe circuit cooler or canned air? That would chill it without making something else dirty or anything wet.

[linaelyn.livejournal.com]

I only know the solution to one of these:

1a) sprinkle corgi in roasted garlic to add some nice flavor to the butter. Serve.

[commodorified.livejournal.com]

Well, she would certainly be very tender. But that would be an EXTREMELY expensive cut of meat.

[linaelyn.livejournal.com]

Sometimes, you just gotta splurge and give yourself a treat, though.

[kalmn.livejournal.com]

after a similar experiment involving a dachshund and carpet, my parents are idly discussing replacing the carpet. just fyi. on the other hand, the doxie is now very easy to amuse-- she'll lick the carpet for hours.

[beccaviola.livejournal.com]

Hmm, what about emulsifying the butter with some other, more easily-emulsified fat? Works with tar...

Failing that, get some Swarfega from somewhere. Enlist willing Brit to post it to you if necessary. That stuff will shift grease off ANYTHING.

[agoodwinsmith.livejournal.com]

For fabric that can be washed in a washing machine, rub a generous dollop of liquid dish soap deeply into the greasy stain of the fabric, and run the item through your normal wash cycle. You may need more than one go to get all of it. For wool, um. I mean: it will work, but your blankie may be a bit smaller than before. Also, it should, in theory, work on the fabric of the couch, but how the dickens you are going to sluice off the soapy residue, I don't know.